A Short-Lived Remission

May 3 Bill's EGD came back negative for cancer.  Remission! Celebration!  Happiness!  A couple days later, trouble swallowing.  Second EGD done on May 25 and we received the results today ... positive for cancer.  So, a very short remission.  What a bummer!

The doctor said that this is the natural progression of the esophogial cancer, but that he is hopeful because now they have something to radiate.  Apparently there is a mass that is pressing on his esophogus that causes him not to swallow.  Radiation will probably begin next week (that's what we're thinking, anyway, as we have a Radiation/Oncologist appointment on Friday).  It will be once every day (M - F) for about 5-6 weeks and a dose of chemo thrown in each week besides. 

To say we're disappointed is an understatement.  We continue to covet your prayers as we begin this new phase of cancer treatment.  Bill is determined to keep trying as long as he is able. 

Memorial Day

Diane and Randie came at noon today for an outdoor "picnic" on our "new" deck.  It was quite warm, but we put out an oscelating fan, since the ceiling fan isn't installed yet.  I forgot to take a picture of all of us at dinner, but here's a few of us for dessert.  When we finished eating, Jon went to his airconditioned room and watched a movie, Jessie played on the iPad, Mom took a nap in the living room and the three of us played Bananagrams.  For a little while, anyway, until it just got too hot.  We finished our games in the house.

Bill didn't have a very good day in eating food.  It seems that no matter what he eats, it doesn't seem to go through and he gets pretty sick.  Hopefully, we'll have an answer tomorrow at the doctor's.  Please continue to pray. 

A Nice Day

Jon went to Sunday School, Bill went to church, Jess and I ate breakfast on the deck.  Chris came over after church for a "picnic" on the deck and a few games afterwards.  Very relaxing until we heard the weather sirens south of us (Shelby Twp? Oakland County?) and I quickly cleaned out the closet under the stairs for Jess, Grandma and me in case of a warning.  Bill and Jon could come in, too, but the basement would be the best spot.  Can't get either Grandma or Jess down those stairs.  Only pouring rain here for a little while and a couple rumbles of thunder.  Nothing close to major.  Thankfully.  We are grateful for God's Hand of protection.

An Emotional Morning

Jon and I met Diane and Randie for breakfast before we went to the cemetery to pay the rest on Mom's headstone, which was in and ready to be installed.  As we drove in the parking lot there were about a dozen Veteran Honor Guards waiting to present at a funeral.  That was emotional and made me think of all the millions of men and women who have died so that we can be free today.  The Veteran's section was a sea of flags on graves.  Many people were also putting flowers on graves. 

We drove to the back of the cemetery and made sure all was well with the headstone.  It seemed so final to see my mom's name, date of birth and date of death.  We then went to the gravesite where our cemetery representative, Richard, cleaned off dad's headstone and placed a flag on it.  As we were standing there, the Veteran Honor Guards shot off their rifles in tribute to the Veteran.  The morning was just too emotional for me.  I had a hard time there and the rest of my day had a shadow of grief over me.  I know that grieving is important for healing, but I won't let it overtake my life each day.  I'll be better in the morning.

Bill had a pretty good day.  He put together a new patio table and chair set and lounged around a bit.  We enjoyed sitting outside this afternoon on our new furniture. 

No News

Well, even though two doctors said that they would call today, neither did, and the biopsy report wasn't in either.  Bummer.  Now we have to wait until Tuesday!  I hate waiting.

Bill put our new deck furniture together today and Jessie decided she liked one of the side tables as a drum.  It's been quite awhile since I posted a picture, so I thought I'd do it tonight.  She was having a good time beating away. 

Just Waiting

Yesterday was the EGD, today we waited, tomorrow we'll know the results.  In the meantime, we continued on.  Grocery shopped and for a change, I rested and took a nap.  It was so cold in the house I had to turn the furnace back up.  I'm also trying to fix deliciously smooth meals for Bill so he can eat something.  For lunch he had pureed macaroni salad and a fruity drink.  Dinner was pureed gnocchi's with cream of mushroom soup, shredded chicken and chopped beet salad.  Dessert he had crumbled strawberry shortcake and pureed peaches and strawberries.  All went down without any pain. 

Riding The Rollercoaster of Emotions

Bill had his EGD this morning.  The doctor found a mass in the gastroesophageal junction and took a deeper biopsy.  It could be scar tissue.  It could be cancer.  He's just not taking any chances.  We'll know the results on Friday.  Please continue to pray as Bill is unable to eat solid food.

Just a few short weeks ago Bill was told that there was no cancer in the previous biopsy done on May 3.  Now we're back to waiting to see if that is the case, or if he will need more treatment.  How do we handle this emotionally?   Humanly speaking, we're very discouraged.  It's like being on a rollercoaster.  There have been so many sharp declines and then uptakes that it is hard to adjust to one before another takes over. 

Spiritually speaking, we choose to remain strong in trusting God.  On the way to Bill's test this morning, we heard Laura Story sing, "Blessings".  I've never heard it before, but it spoke to my spirit.  Bring it up on YouTube.   It's worth listening to and thinking about.