What NOT To Do When Shopping With Jessie

As you know, Monday's are Girls Day Out.  We generally go out to lunch and then a store or two.  We have a good time together.  Today I learned what NOT to do the next time we shop.

All day long I have had difficulty walking.  My left hip and knee hurt and my legs feel very weak.  Today was a day I needed the electric wheelchair in order to make it around Target.  I've used it many times, but not with Jessie.  Since she usually clings to my arm, I wasn't sure how I was going to keep track of her.  First she tried the back of my coat, then the arm rests, then the basket.  None worked, so I used my right hand to propell the cart and held her hand with my left hand. 

All seemed to go well until I spotted a good deal on a case of water.  I stopped and got out of the cart and turned to get the case of water when I heard her say: "Jessie tired.  Sit now."  I turned around and she was in the cart and had her finger on the throttle and aiming for the aisle. 

You know how sometimes people say they see their whole life flash before them, well I didn't get a flash of my life, but instantly got a flash of the past and one of the possible present.  Years ago when we were at Family Camp Jess got on a friend's golf cart with me and before I could do anything, her foot was on the "gas" peddle and we were off!  I couldn't get her foot off and we were headed for people and the tabernacle.  Luckily we did stop in time.  That was the past flash.  The next flash was seeing her taking off down the middle aisle of Target, yelling "Yee Hah!" and me "running" after her.  What a disaster that could have been.  Thank God I had shut the machine off before I got off.    

Another Birthday Celebration

Diane and Randie came for a birthday celebration dinner for Bill.  Randie made a delicious pumpkin spice cake.  Unfortunately, Bill was unable to try any food or cake because his nose was bleeding - for over 3 hours!  So right after this picture was taken and he opened his present, Jon took Bill to prompt care.  I called ahead to make sure there was a doctor there that could cauterize his nose and there was.  It was better than going to the ER, that's for sure.  Much cheaper, too.

Bill felt much better when he returned home.  Having a bloody nose for so many hours took a toll on him emotionally, as well as physically.  He was also very disappointed that he couldn't try his dinner and cake, too. 

Today's Lesson

As you know, I have been very frustrated lately because my days just don't turn out like I plan them.  Something always happens that messes up my neatly planned day.  Like I have control over it or something. 

Ultimately, if I believe the Bible, it states that our steps are ordered by the Lord.  So, I can plan all I want but He has the final schedule.   I have been asking the Holy Spirit to show me what I need to do about this.  While glancing at a magazine this morning I read a line that has stuck with me all day O(good thing!).  This writer was talking about his Aunt and the way she looked at each day.  She said that (each day) "is a gift you take for what it is, not for what you wish it was." 

My problem is that I have been fighting the things that happen because they mess up my orderly schedule.  I need to thank God for each day, no matter what happens.

OK - so now I need to tell you about my day.  It began with doing about 15 minutes of paperwork before Jon suggested we go out to breakfast.  The 2 of us left and after eating we went to Kohl's and Michael's and bought some Christmas presents with the coupons I had.  While we were having breakfast I started with a terrible headache and it got worse instead of better.  When we got home I put in a load of wash and heated up a few rice packs for my eyes and neck and sat in my chair for an hour.  Felt better when I got up and began some paperwork before I remembered I needed to go down to the basement and switch over the wash.  While I was down there the phone rang and my friend, Laura, called and asked me to pick her up from the hospital.  She had major surgery on Wednesday and needed a ride home. Jon went with me and not only did we bring her home but we had to go to Meijer's and get a prescription for her.

By the time we got home it was time to switch over the wash again and begin dinner.  While we were gone today Bill went through his closet and removed clothes that don't fit.  They were piled neatly on the bed, but I had to take care of them after we ate.  Just as I got started Chris called (Laura's cousin) and said that she couldn't get Laura to answer her door or phone.  Jon and I took off and went over there, too.  Making my long story short, we ended up calling 911 and taking her back to the hospital.  Chris is with her now.

By the time we got home it was after 9:00 p.m., Jessie was asleep on the couch, the bed was piled high with clothes, as well as washer and dryer were filled.  Paperwork?  It's still there.  So much for my nicely planned day to stay home and do nothing but paperwork. 

Frustrated?  No, not anymore.  I'm thanking God for today instead.  It wasn't what I had planned, but it was what He allowed to happen and I even had a part in helping a friend.  That's what was most important.  

I Sound Like I'm Repeating Myself

Jon and Jess both had good days.  Bill didn't.  He had a bloody nose that lasted 40 minutes, and taking care of that made him late for his lunch, so he only got 2 nutritional "meals" today.  The bloody nose was pretty bad and we were wondering if we would have to go back to the ER and have it caterized.  Thankfully, it stopped.  He also felt pretty wiped out and nauseated. 

My day started out good.  Teased Jon alot before he left for a day out.  Went to breakfast with Julie, then grocery shopped at Kroger's.  However, being tired and helping Bill with his problem, put a cloak of heaviness over me.  Sounds stupid, but I don't know how to describe it other than that way.  I tried having some time for myself today but it just didn't work out - again.  Maybe tomorrow.

Happy Birthday, Bill

Today is Bill's 65th birthday.  He had a good physical and relaxing day.  Late in the afternoon we drove down to the Hobby Shop so he could buy some windows and doors for a (very large) birdhouse he's going to make this winter to keep occupied.  When we left the northern sky was black; the southern sky was blue sky, fluffy clouds and lots of sunshine.  While we were gone, the northern sky let loose with yet another rainfall.  On the way home, the southern sky was still bright and Jessie noticed this rainbow out the van window.  It was really beautiful.  We made out 5 colors: orange, yellow, green, blue and purple.  I don't think I've ever seen purple in a rainbow before.  Anyway, it was a birthday gift to Bill.  It was awesome.  I forgot to mention that there were 2 rainbows.  Can you see it?

We enjoyed a very nice birthday dinner while Bill played on the computer.  Chris came and helped us celebrate.  When it came time for dessert, I gave him a teensy tiny piece of brownie cake that Jessie and Shannon made for him.  One bite.  It went down.  He said it tasted good. He wasn't about to try anymore, though. 

I want to tell you what Jessie said to me this morning:  She's in our room, watching tv and playing on the iPad.  My alarm goes off and I press the snooze button.  And again.  And again.  About the fourth time Jessie says: "Stay up, Mom.  Shannon's here."  That got my heart going a little faster only to look at the clock and realize that she was joking.  So, I went back to sleep.  Next time the alarm went off and I didn't get up again, she said:  "Stay up, Mom!  SANTA'S HERE!" 

106 !!!!!

I think I hit an all-time high in page reviews yesterday.  Believe it or not, 106 was the number of hits on my blog.  Amazing.  Incredible.  Unbelievable!  Extremely humbling.

Today God reminded me how much I'm loved.  Thanks, Julie, Rox and Kathy, for your phone calls.  Thanks, Cheryl, for your card.  Thanks Pastor Garry for your visit.  Thanks, Randie, for letting Jessie and I drop in for a few minute's chat.  Thanks Shannon, Mary, Pat and Lynn for a Red Lobster dinner for my birthday tonight.  In trying days the cards, phone calls and outings are like a breath of fresh air.  Thank you, my friends!  You know, it's not the big things in life that count. 

No melt downs for Jessie today.  Bill felt pretty good, not great, just good.  Jon had a good day at work. 

Preparing For Winter

My friend, Doreen, came this afternoon and cleaned out my garden for the winter.  I defrosted my garage freezer (would have been easier if I had done it a month ago when it was alot warmer).  Bill and I went to Goike's and got a bushel of squash for fall dinners and freezing.  Tomorrow I'll pick up a bushel of golden delicious apples from "my mom's apple lady".  I began putting outdoor items away in the playhouse, which is a great storage area when not in use as a picnic area or get away.   I just don't want to put away cushions and stuff from the deck.  I'm holding out for at least a couple more days that we can sit out there.  It is really nice.  Oh, and I put the ice scraper in the van. 

Bill felt a tad bit better than yesterday but not much.  Jessie only had 2 melt downs.  Jon spent the day shopping and going to the show.  He had a great day off. 

How Was My Day?

Very challenging.  It began at 5:55 a.m. when Jess got up for the day and put on her videos.  I was too tired to get up and make her go back to bed, so background morning sleeping music was various videos.  Bill had several bloody noses before he took a shower and didn't feel well.

The physical therapist arrived at 10:00 a.m. for Mom S.  I went back up stairs and took care of Bill.  (He needs to have his peg tube bandage changed at least daily, if not twice.  Plus, I give him a shot in his stomach around 9:00 a.m. each day.)  I gave him some hydrocodone and he went directly to the couch where he spent the day - again.  Jess played on her iPad.  I began wash - ended up doing 5 loads.

At 12:30 the Occupational Therapist arrived, and that sent Mom S over the edge.  She is not willing to do anything to help herself become stronger and resents anyone here.  She was not very nice to the OT and after she left, she got very upset and created a problem.  Which wasn't what Jessie needed since she was near her and it sent Jess into a crying, shut-down mode for almost an hour.  All this was more than Bill wanted to handle, too.  Plus, it was very evident that we couldn't go on our girls day out for lunch. 

By 3:15 when the nurse arrived Mom S was calmer but very unhappy that blood work needs to be taken often, as well as blood pressure.  She doesn't quite get the fact that since she's on coumadin the INR needs to be kept at a certain level.  Tomorrow the home health aide comes to assist her in a shower.  (I think I'll leave the house!)

Oh, yes - also in the middle of all this Bill says to me, "Just to let you know, I have pain in my face."  Now, my first thought goes to the jaw for heart trouble, but he said that it was under the right eye, in the eye socket and over the eye.  It was pretty intense for awhile.  We finally determined that it was probably bone pain that he has after chemo and the next-day shot.  We hope.

Jess and I finally left for our girls day out at 5:15 p.m.  We met Chris at Wendy's in Romeo for dinner then went to K-Mart to shop for a birthday present for Bill (it's Thursday, the 27th).  We got home around 7:45 p.m. 

Clothers are folded and on the couch - where they'll stay until tomorrow.  I am going upstairs in a few minutes and calling it a day.  Tomorrow could only be better.  Hopefully.

A Better Day For Bill

We are so very thankful that today was so much better than yesterday.  He's still plastered to the couch, but he's been up and around a bit.  He was well enough that after Jess and I had our church time on tv this morning and prayer, we went to breakfast.  Something special.  She seemed to have a really good day.  Especially since she saw her most favorite friends at the Garden:  Bill and Nancy.  They were with other couples we know from church, but Bill and Nancy are her favorite!

A Fun Day (for me)

I went with Diane and Randie for an appointment in Birmingham this afternoon.  Before we got there we ate at the Athens Coney Island - a diner on Woodward.  I took a picture of it because it's the first time I ate in a diner and it was neat. I'll post it later when I think about it before I begin my blog.  I had a coney dog and a bowl of their home made macaroni and cheese that was excellent. On the way home we went to a couple stores.  A very nice day out for me.  Thanks, Diane and Randie!

Unfortunately, Bill had a very bad physical day.  He was plastered to the couch all day and very, very sick.  He's hopeing for a better day tomorrow.

Facebook

I have heard so many people make negative comments on how people use FB by posting useless tidbits, and they don't want to waste their time with it.  Well, that may be true for some people, but the people I have friended care about me and my family.  We keep up with each other's world and pray for each other.  I love seeing pictures of out-of-state relatives and friends and their families.  I pray for their requests, too. 

It is a great way to feel connected.  Since Bill was diagnosed with cancer, he's spent many hours plastered to the couch.  At first there were lots of phone calls and visits.  It's been almost a year and a half and the phone is quiet and visits are rare.  For months now I have been teaching him about FB and how to keep up with our family and friends.  Yesterday he said he wanted his own account!  He no longer wanted to share "ours".  Well! 

So, if you're on FB and want to friend Bill, please do so.  He's learning now how to post his own messages and respond back.  It makes him feel really connected to his friends. 

It wasn't too bad of a day for him physically.  Very red and hot from the steroids, nauseated but not too bad.  Now if he could only sleep.  He usually has insomnia for several nights after chemo.  Go figure!

Chemo #16 - Done

Bill informed me that this chemo infusion was #16.  Wow.  To think that we've walked into that room 16 times.  Before we left today I prayed with Bill in the van that all would go well and that they would be able to get the blood out right away.  What a miracle - neither one of us was watching the nurse and she put the needle in, primed it and was on her second bottle of blood before either one of us noticed!  She laughed and said she didn't say anything because it was going so well.  Thank you, Jesus.  As of right now, he's not feeling too bad.

The intake nurse was here to "check" Mom S. in for Home Care.  The "invasion" of medical personnel has begun. 

A Kind Of Eeyore Day

So dark, rainy, windy.  Makes one want to take a day's nap, or be gloomy like Eeyore.  That's me today.  Gloomy, gloomy, gloomy.

Brought Mom S home.  She seems to be doing well.  Bill worked out in his workshop all day.  He won't be able to get out there again for a week or more.  He enjoyed himself.  Jon is at work.  Jessie ... well, she's not been very nice ALL day.  From the moment she got out of bed until now.  Very challenging.

Please remember Bill as he has chemo in the morning.  We appreciate it.

A Wonderful Gift

Bill blessed me with a wonderful gift today ... a cleaned garage!  He's been working on it for days, and it looks wonderful!  Our new van fits in there quite nicely, too.  Thank you, sweetheart!  I love you!

Please continue to pray for Bill as he psychologically prepares to walk into the infusion room on Thursday.  That is the hardest part - beside all the side effects. 

A Productive Day

Of course, today was Girls Day Out.  Only Jessie wasn't being on her best behavior, so I left her home (with Jon) and took Bill to the post office and bank.  Then we did go out to lunch and the Dollar Store.  She was very excited to get more workbook books.  She really loves doing paper work.  Hum.  Maybe I should give her some of mine!

Jane and Rachel came and took Jess to Blake's Apple Orchard to pick apples, have cider and donuts and go out to dinner at Wendy's.  She sure has had a good day.  While she was gone Bill and I went to Kroger's and got a few things I needed and turned in way-too-many pop bottles. 

Bill began cleaning the garage so that soon, very soon? I will be able to park the van in the garage.  I'm not a fan of scraping ice and snow off the windows.  It's been a temporary workshop while he worked all summer on the deck. 

Grandma is coming home on Wednesday.  We would all appreciate prayers as she adjusts to being home again.  We're not sure how much help she'll need, but she will come home with Home Help.  A nurse, pt, ot and and aide will invade our home for quite sometime.  Please pray for me as I try to help her, as well as care for Bill who will be having chemo again on Thursday. 

How's That?

As many of you know, we have been having trouble with Jessie yelling "NO!" whenever anyone coughs, clears their throats or sneezes.  It is very wearing, to say the least.  I've tried to tell her each time that when someone coughs, she should say, "Bless You!" That doesn't happen often.  Anyway, this morning she was on a roll with her "No's" and we were ignoring her.  She stopped, quietly said, "Bless you," then said ... "How's that?"  Oh, my gosh.  Who could keep from laughing?  Not us, for sure.

We went and visited Grandma today.  We brought her to the main lounge and had ice cream.  Jess was goofing around with dad's hat.  Such a cute young lady.  Too bad she doesn't always act like one!

An Extremely Blustery Day

Wow!  It's a wonder that all trees are not bare and ready for winter.  I can't remember when the wind blew as much as it did today.

We were going to go see Grandma today but Jon's still not feeling well, Jessie was not in a good mood all day and had a melt down.  Bill has been sick all day with pain and throwing up.  Saliva wasn't going through to the stomach again.  He's very fatigued.  Me - well, I'm doing wash, vacuumed the house, paperwork and took an hours nap.  That about sums up our day. 

Wasted Time?

Bill and I left early this morning and took a friend to the airport in Flint.  It was patchy rain all the way there and back, with some breakthrough sun.  Not much.  Stopped for breakfast in Davison and home by 12:30 p.m.  Put a load of wash in, made a few business phone calls and called it quits.  I laid down for a few minutes because I was so tired and slept for almost 4 hours !!!!  I felt so guilty when I got up because I had wasted 4 hours of my day where I could have been doing more wash, cleaning house, paper work, etc.,  etc., etc.  Did I really waste my time?  I think I must have needed that rest or I wouldn't have slept for 4 hours.  I would still be sleeping if Bill hadn't asked me if I planned on getting up today. 

Another Game Plan

Bill had a scheduled oncologist appointment today and we have another game plan.  He will be having chemo again next Thursday, two weeks later a CT scan, a week later an appointment with the gastroenterologist then a week later another OV with the oncologist.  When we see the gastro. dr., we will discuss if he thinks it's feasible to check the valve in the esophogus/stomach and see if it is non functioning.  This may be the reason Bill is unable to get food down into the stomach.  We'll see.

Between now and next Thursday, Bill will be in high-gear getting things done while he is physically able to do them.  He's still working on cleaning his workshop.  Next comes the garage, and somewhere along the line we need to put things away for winter.  Ah, winter.  I am not looking forward to it.  I really enjoy going sockless.

Divine Intervention

Bill, Jon, Jess and I took off yesterday morning and went up north to see the colors and visit Ruth, Bill and Billy in their home near Lewiston.  Colors were nice but alot of trees were almost bare.  We spent the night at the Hampton Inn in Gaylord and left this morning.  We took a small side trip to Hartwick Pines.  Arrived back home at 3:45 p.m. after traveling 553 miles.  As a side note, we got 28.5 mpg with our new van!

On the road into Lewiston a strange thing happened.  Bill was driving with Jon in the front seat with him.  Jess and I were in the back.  I'm not sure who yelled first (Bill/Jon), but when I looked up all I saw was a deer in front of the van.  However, he looked a little weird.  I had the immediate impression that a very big hand was on his butt pushing him across the road - he looked something like an accordian!  I closed my eyes, said "Oh, Lord Jesus!" and prepared for impact.  Nothing.  There was absolutely no way we could have missed him.  I believe it was a divine intervention.  I never said anything to Bill or Jon about my impression until we got home when I asked them for their version.  It was just like mine!  Wow!  Thank you, Jesus, for protecting us on the road by sending your angel(s) to push that deer across the road.

I need to tell you this, too, because it's just too funny ... We stopped on the way home in Saginaw at the Flying J / Wendy's for lunch.  After I ordered I asked the girl if they gave senior citizen discounts.  She said, "No, this isn't a real Wendy's".  I stared at her and I really didn't quite know what to say - I was sure we were in Wendy's.  It looked exactly like any other Wendy's I've ever been in.  I continued staring at her then  I finally asked, "So, this is pretend?"  (She didn't think that was funny.)  She responded by saying that it was owned by a very large corporation and they owned this particular Wendy's and THEY didn't give discounts.  Oh, please.  Either I was in Wendy's or I wasn't.

Ice Cream Social

Did you know that every afternoon at Shelby Nursing Center from 2:30 - 3:30 p.m. is Ice Cream Social for the residents and their families?  We made sure that when we went to see Grandma today that we were there for that.  Grandma had chocolate, Jessie had strawberry and I had praline pecan.  Yum.  We took Grandma to the main room for the social then visited and listened to the residents and 2 very vocal volunteers singing songs from the ... 40's, 50's ????  "Won't You Come Home Bill Baily?"  "You Are My Sunshine".  I have to say that my family wasn't too impressed with my joining in.  What can I say?  I like music and I like to sing!

What Have We Done To Deserve Such Wonderful Weather?

It bears repeating that the weather today was awesome.  Spent most of the day on the deck.  Breakfast, lunch and dinner.  Wonderful.  Had a house full of company this afternoon and we even played Apples to Apples on the deck.  That made Jessie VERY happy.

Bill wasn't feeling well enough this morning to go to church.  I encouraged him to go back to bed and take a nap.  He slept for a couple hours and woke feeling better. Jon worked today and will tomorrow, also.  He was pretty tired tonight.  Too bad he couldn't enjoy the outside weather. 

Bonfire

Not only have the days been weather wonderful, but the evenings have, too.  We've enjoyed sitting on our enclosed deck almost every evening after dark.  Tonight, we were invited to a bonfire at our friend's house.  Jess went with us and had a very nice time.  Of course, I did bring the iPad in case she got bored.  She enjoyed being outside, eating hot dogs, chips and corn on the cob, and petting the two dogs that were there.  When it was time to go she didn't want to leave.  She was involved in a game of golf.  I didn't know she knew how to play it, but she did and even got a hole in one!

Disappointment

Bill, Jon and I went out to IHOP for breakfast today.  Bill and I haven't been there in about 20 years, so it was a special place for him to begin eating.  The French toast he ordered was really good - I ate it along with my breakfast.  After eating about the fourth piece, it got stuck in Bill's throat. 

For a snack this afternoon he tried eating Meijer's macaroni salad that has always gone down, but to pray that we will have wisdom to know what to do with the advise given by doctors.  Bill is very discouraged and disappointed.  He had so hoped to be able to begin eating again. 

What Could Be Better ...

than a sunshiny, warm fall day?  Bill spent the day out in his workshop cleaning, and putting some final touches on the deck.  Jessie and Shannon did grocery shopping and Jon spent most of the day at church working on youth stuff.  I spent the day shopping with a friend. 

Tomorrow Bill is going to try eating solid food.  Let's pray that it will go well.

A Ten Minute Sleep

Bill had his esophogus stretched today and it went well.  Bill's only complaint was that he only was asleep for 10 minutes!  He can try to eat solid foods in a couple days.  Thanks so much for your prayers.  When we got home after a couple stops, he rested on the deck for most of the day.  It's been such great weather and we have been enjoying our "new" deck.  We cosied up on the couch out there after dark and played Words on the iPad, as well as Bee Cells. 

A New Experience For Bill Tomorrow

We have to be at the surgery center at 8:40 a.m. tomorrow.  Bill will be having his esophogus stretched.  We'd appreciated prayer for a successful procedure.  We're hopeful that he will be able to eat food again.  That's the goal!

Bill's been well enough these past two days to work outside.  He's been very tired, but pleased that he was able to do some work.

It was such a wonderful weather day today.  I packed up all my paperwork that I needed to do and sat on the deck and spent the day working outside.  That was very refreshing.

A Great Girls Day Out

Our day began when we left at 8:45 a.m. to go to Jessie's dental appointment with Dr. Mak.  He is such an awesome dentist.  No cavaties!  Yah!!!!

From there we went to breakfast then the nursing center to see Grandma.  She looked really good sitting up in her wheelchair and her new hairdo.  She was especially glad to see Jessie.

Post Office then home for a 1:00 appointment with a behaviorist from the county.  I've finally gotten someone to help me with behavior issues.  So far everyone I've taken Jessie to says that I am doing a good job and keep it up.  Well, if I'm doing such a good job, why do we still have behavioral issues?  He will work with me for the first month or so and then with both of us.  I'm looking forward to trying anything that will help us overcome her anxiety attacks.

When he left we went to Wendy's for a chicken caesar wrap then to the Kezar Library to look at their books in the Used Book Sale section.  At 3:30 we were at Veronica's getting our hair cut.  At 4:45 I stopped and visited my friend Mary for a few minutes in her driveway.  Finally home around 5:30 p.m.  A very long but great day with my wonderful daughter.   

Another Fast Day

Bill was feeling well enough to go to church today, so after Jon was finished with Sunday School, we traded vehicles (plus Jess) and attended a very awesome service.  However, no matter how hard I try, I'm beginning to feel like someone standing outside looking in.  Both Bill and I miss being involved in the life of our church. 

After lunch Chris came and visited for awhile, then I began dinner preparations.  JoAnne came for dinner and we had a nice visit.  Got Jess a bath, put her to bed and JoAnne got up to leave.  Not.  Flat tire.  We're now waiting for a tow truck to fix it.  Bummer.  Not a bummer that she's still here ... a bummer that it happened.  However, better here than along side the road somewhere. 

Another week begins.  Please pray for Bill as he anticipates his procedure on Wednesday to stretch his esophogus.  Please pray that it will be successful and he will be able to eat food again.  He's not been able to eat in several months, and I know this is hard on him. 

Happy 59th Birthday To Me

Where has the time gone?  When I was growing up I could not vision my life past 21.  I didn't believe that I would live past that age for some reason.  I'm sure glad that I was wrong.  I've had a wonderful 59 years. 

It was a beautiful fall day and Bill was feeling great compared to yesterday, so he went with me to Kohl's where I spent my 20% off coupon, $10.00 gift card that Kohl's actually sent me for my birthday, and $20.00 Kohl's bucks.  The place was packed.  You'd think it was a couple days before Christmas!

Diane and Randie came for dinner.  We ordered Chinese take out and they brought a delicious carrot cake.  In all, it was a very nice day.  I am a blessed woman, that's for sure.